Sunday, June 24, 2012

Out to Sea Again

It hasn't really sunk in yet that he'll be gone for awhile. It's not a bad length of time, it's only a month, but any length of time is hard. Some people say, oh well it's only a month. I don't care if it's a day, a week, a month, or whatever. It's still hard. Then there are other people who say, "Well, we've been married for 15 years and by then you want them to leave." Umm. REALLY??!!?? I don't care if we've been married for 2 years, 5 years or 20. It's still hard. I know that this time it's only for a month, and it's really not that bad, but it's the fact that we won't get to be with each other on his birthday and our 2 year anniversary. Guess that's life for ya. {Side note: we were both saying to each other last night, that we both don't regret him surprising me on our 1st anniversary last year (and thus spending a lot of money) because if we were to miss both our 1st and 2nd anniversaries, that would have been too sad}. Fortunately, I'll get to see him during the half-way mark, which will make this time go by quicker.

**See, even his socks are sad he's going to be gone!**

Another thing that will make this time go by easier, is the Netflix que that I have set up for myself while Adam is away. I even took the time to arrange them to how I want to view them. You can tell that I have classic novel days, 70's and 80's themed week, suspence-thriller week. I am way too excited for this to start!! All of these movies will be new ones for me, except for 6 of them. Really excited about some of these views, others just seemed interesting. 

**Bring on the movies!!**

Anyways, we went on our last date yesterday. I was feeling like Sushi, so we found this good Sushi place in town and decided to try it out. We both decided to do the all you can eat sushi. Yeah, that won't be happening for me again. I never know why I always doubt myself. I know my body and my eating abilities, and why do I always think I'm hungrier than I am? Especially since I've been maintaining my healthy lifestyle, it always happens that I feel sick after I eat too much or something that I don't usually eat. Oh well, it was just one night (for awhile at least). We then went back home and then once we felt up to it, we went to Coldstones and indulged in a sweet treat. Yeah, that won't be happening for awhile, too. We both commented how our treats were way too sweet for us. What are we, and what have we become??!!?? 

ON a different note, I really liked my outfit that I wore yesterday. I've been feeling like wearing this dress, since it is supposed to be summer, yet it's been raining on and off all week, including yesterday. So I decided I would wear it despite the rain, but wear it with my cotton tights and boots. I was kind of doubting that it would all work, but I am very pleased with how it turned out. I even did something I don't do often and put my hair up in a bun! Go me!


I was also feeling good, because if you look at this picture of me wearing this same dress almost 3 years ago for our engagement photo shoot, you can tell that my healthy lifestyle has really made an impact, which I am super please about!!

**On our engagement photo shoot, 09-17-2009**

What really inspired this dressy outfit, was the book that I am reading through that I mentioned on my last post, The Power of a Praying Wife. In this excerpt, that I have photo-captured below, it basically talks about what we are doing as a wife to make ourselves attractive to our husband. Are we taking care of ourselves, by regularly keeping ourselves clean and groomed? Are we keeping a healthy diet or exercising to keep ourselves rejuvenated? Do we dress attractively or spend time with God every day? This all hit me. It didn't hit me hard, meaning this isn't something that I feel I really need to work on. However, I feel I don't need to let it get to the point that I really need to be asking myself these questions.


 Sometimes I fall into the habit of just wearing casual clothes when I'm around Adam. I mean we only see each other when I get off work, and when I come home I want to change and be comfortable. Isn't that every women's thought after work??!!?? But I've decided to wear nicer clothes, that are still comfortable, all day so he can see me nice, too. Also, some days I feel like I am rushing in the morning and thus don't have time to really make my hair look nice, so when Adam walks and picks me up my hair looks terrible (in my opinion). It's just the little things that I want to do, that I feel like will make a difference. And I don't want to do them just so that he can notice. No, that's not it at all. Stormie Omartian makes the point in the book to say that you can't put expectations on your husband, when you are praying for or changing some of your ways. Let me explain what this means, with my own personal example from yesterday.

When I had planned our menu for this last weeks dinners, I told him a week ago that I wanted Saturday to be a dinner out. So we had known that we were going to have a special dinner all week, since we wouldn't be able to have one for awhile. Adam was able to get off work early, and I thought it would be a perfect opportunity for me to dress up for him (and for our dinner date) before he got home. He immediately said I looked nice, which I appreciated. When he finally felt rejuvenated, we left for our dinner, ha at 4pm. When we were just about to leave I said, "You're wearing that?" He was wearing a shirt and shorts, his usual attire. I didn't really say anything and we headed out the door. When we got in the car I said, "I would have appreciated you dressing up a bit for our date." He told me he didn't think he needed to dress up, so he found a shirt and shorts that color-coordinated. I said, well we're going on a nice date, do I need to tell you when to dress up? And he said "yes, that would be nice." He was being serious. I prayed at that moment, telling God that I shouldn't have put expectations on him without communicating them to him, and still wanting him to follow through without him knowing how I felt. I didn't want this to ruin our time together, but I think we got it worked out by ending it at this point, because I could really understand his perspective, and my expectations. I felt that since I was dressed up nice, which was my choice, that he needed to be dressed up too. He didn't know that I felt this way, because I hadn't communicated this need (it was a silent expectation), so he just color-coordinated his outfit with mine, still being casual. If I am going to make the choice to look nice for a date, that's my choice. Period. If I am going to make the choice to look nice for him daily, that's my choice. Period. I don't do these things with the expectation of getting something in return, and that's Stormies main point when feeling the need to change for your husband. If it is something that I want my husband to change or start doing, that's where the prayer comes in, but you wait for him to start doing the "change" on his own. What a powerful lesson I learned, and what a good point she makes. 

Hope you can find something encouraging from our silly, real-life example.

Happy first full week of summer to you!!
 

2 comments:

  1. Let me tell you what: it bothers me when people say "I'm ready for my hubby to be gone!" too! WHAT ARE THEY THINKING? We've only been married two and a half years (ummm... more than half of which he has been deployed or gone with work-ups!) but I can never see myself feeling that way! I was just talking to Nan about this earlier!

    You know this month will fly by and you will ROCK it! I don't care if it's a duty night or a year long deployment: when my husband is not in bed beside me at night, at the dinner table with me, or sitting next to me on the couch, I miss him! Never let anyone invalidate your feelings, friend!

    I also feel like right before they leave for any kind of extended period of time, tension is high! Regardless of how long my hubby has been or will be home though, if I don't lay out an outfit for him, he will look like a clown. I'm not even joking. He was getting better before this last deployment, and I'm anxious to see if he'll remember after 9 months of Army Green!

    {sorry for the longest comment in the history of blogging!}

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  2. Thanks for the encouragement friend. You got me laughing now, so I think the longevity of your comment is well okay. :D I know you are just dying to get yours back. It will be fun for you both to actually just "date." Looking forward to that time for you. :)

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